Growlers Be Comin' to Get You
Polar Bears
Black Bears
Panda Bears
Kermode Bears
Grizzly Bears
Welcome to my homepage. What is this, exactly?

Everybody knows that bears are cute, furry and fun. But what you don't know is that, if they could, bears would eat you and everyone you care about.

For many years I believed that bears were nice and peaceful. I bought into this balderdash that they were an important part of the ecosystem and that the world as we know it would collapse without them. I now realize that I was a victim of the Bear Lobby, a powerful political committee that seeks to end human life as we know it through the use of bears. It is now my mission to educate others about this dangerous conspiracy.

If you, like me, have been fooled into believing that bears have the same right to live as any other animal, then please, read on, and educate yourself.

Who am I?

I am a concerned citizen. I have a degree in biology and am currently working on my Master's degree in International Relations and European Studies. As such, I have an extensive knowledge about the different kinds of bears and their impact on the international political economy.

Most of my friends are surprised to learn that there is a "bear indicator" used by economists to determine how an economy is doing. Basically, the more bears there are, the worse the global economy does. There is a very clear and profound link between these two facts. I will not insult your intelligence by explaining this clear causal link. In addition, most of my friends are surprised to learn that I am dedicating so much time to such a strange hobby as writing about bear conspiracies. But the joke will be on them when they're all eaten by bears. Also, do you think it is a coincidence that economists talk about a "bear economy?" This is deliberate.

What can you learn on this site?

On this site, you can learn the various myths and lies associated with different kinds of bears. I have separated my page according to the six main types of stupid bears. I have chosen to focus on grizzlies, pandas, black bears, kermode bears, polar bears, and - the worst of the worst - koalas.

Unfortunately, I don't have enough time to discuss the other kinds of bears that are equally as terrible. There are many, not the least of which are brown bears and also a few other types.

Make sure to wear a helmet because your mind is about to be blown.

How can I get involved?

Spread the word! The more people know about the Bear Lobby, the less power they have over us! Be sure to link to this page and to email everyone in your address book with a link to this website. Also, spread the wealth! Your financial donations keep this page alive. Please send your credit card number, type, expiration date and the name appearing on the card to my email.

In addition to sending me your credit card details, you can also follow my blog for recent updates. And, while you're at it, why not grab this solidarity button and put it on your site? Be sure to link back!

Just download it to your hard drive and link it back here.
Site owned and operated by a concerned citizen.